This summer has been a difficult/long one. I'm not talking the heat index we've had here of 112+ for several days in a row. Summer school has worked me over to the point where I felt emotionally exhausted at the end of June. Not only have I had to deal with new surroundings, I've had to adjust to the new way of doing things here at State. This university is NOTHING like North Central, and I've had to remember that each and every time I walk into a classroom. I certainly realized it during Trigonometry (more on that later), and I've realized it pretty much every day since. I've also had to get used to the thought that I'm kind of on my own. A LONG way from home. This summer/coming year will mark the first time I've ever lived away from home and out of state. Ah! I've had to deal with being the minority in my dorm (not that it's a bad thing...it's just different and hard to get used to), and I had to deal with a roommate for 5 weeks whose rhythm wasn't quite matched up to mine. Back to my school subjects, I thought trigonometry would nearly kill me!!! But surprise, surprise, it didn't. I even eked out a B (I still think there was some sort of mix up! haha). Physical science I passed with a C, but all that is required of me is to pass, and I figure if I can do all that and end up with a C or a B, I've done well. Currently, I'm 3 weeks into taking Earth Science (geology), and it hasn't been too bad yet. My lab is much harder than my lecture (my lecture tests are SUPER easy :) ), but I'm hopeful I'll be able to pass it with flying colors. These courses have absolutely nothing to do with my major; however, as long as I get the credits I need, I won't complain. I'm just really looking forward to the fall to see what all is in store for me!
On another front, I've been extremely blessed in these last 7 1/2 weeks. I've made some friends through church and Bible study that I probably wouldn't have made had I not said to myself, "Get over your shyness and meet people. God doesn't drag people to you, nor does He drag you into a meeting." So, I had to overcome my own shyness and self-consciousness to be willing to try something new, and the effort I think has paid off. I really enjoy my Bible study group, though I'm still getting used to the church; I'm so used to things being done a certain way that it's hard to get used to anything else!!! I also will admit that I'm still biased in preaching (my dad is a preacher after all ;) ), and also in music directing (Miss Mona is still the best one, in my opinion!). Leaving behind the familiar and everything you know is as hard as they say. I had a really hard first 2 weeks, and I won't deny that I cried plenty of times during those 2 weeks. Then again, nobody said that growing up was easy or enjoyable, and if any kid comes to me and says they can't wait to grow up, I think I owe it to them to tell them that growing up isn't carefree, nor is it something you should want so badly that you neglect what you're going through right now. I used to think it'd be fun to be an adult, but now I don't know! Being an adult has certainly helped me see more of who I really am, and taking responsibility for myself is a much bigger job than I imagined even 2 years ago.
While home will always be where my parents are, I think that God can use that separation as a time for testing my own faith and self. I've felt myself tested to the point where I said, "I really want to go home." During the last 2 months, I've been reading through the book of Psalms, sometimes journaling and sometimes not. I noticed that when I was having the hardest time(s), I would read a Psalm that talked about how God is always on my side, and how He never abandons us in troubled times. There are so many of those Psalms in the Bible, but I found it funny how I read them during the times I needed to hear them most. Not an accident, in my opinion.
This will probably be it for a long time...not like I blog often anyway, but I hope that I'll be super busy in the fall. :)
